"Plastic"

The Gilbey Brothers bring us their latest film, which is based on a remarkable true story.

Sam and his little band of followers do well for themselves. Are they really good at the commodities market?  Have they got that one item to sell that no-one else has? Do they provide a service which is in great demand?  No. They commit credit card fraud. They steal peoples card data, and then by cloning the cards they go on a huge spending spree, and then sell the items and enjoy the cash.
When pulling off one particular job, they just happen to rip off the wrong guy, as he is an accountant for a rather unpleasant gangster, Marcel. The team are given a choice of producing a few million pound to appease his wrath, or run the risk of losing vital parts of their anatomy before ending up six feet under.

So in order to put right what they have done because of card fraud, they decide to rectify by doing card fraud, but on a grand scale. Initially they plan to make enough money to get Marcel off their backs, but then a plan comes to mind to sort him, and to set them all up for life.

Can they pull off the biggest job and save their lives? Or does the old saying that crime never pays ring true?

This is a distinctly average film. I would love to know how much of the film is based on fact, and how much has been doctored to appeal to the movie going audience. Its like an empty present, it looks pretty on the outside but it pretty disappointing when you open the box to find nothing there.
Out of the cast, Will Poulter shines above all his fellow members, and the film is well photographed.
I suppose I had high expectations, given that the Gilbey brothers previous film was "A Lonely Place To Die"  (Review available on here), and I rank this is a truly exceptional thriller. So it is a shame that this new effort barely gets close to that earlier movie.

Ok, but that is as exciting as one gets.......5 out of 10

"Love Bite"

The seaside can be a fun place to visit, fish and chips, a walk on the beach, visit the amusement arcades, and ripped to shreds by a werewolf......

Yes that last one is correct, well it is in Rainmouth, where this latest comedy horror is set. The sleepy seaside town has fallen victim to a lycanthrope.
Jamie (Ed Speleers), who more orless runs his mother's boarding house, hangs around the town with his friends, a motley group of no-hopers, all represented from the nerd, to the cock sure sex mad one. However, Jamie's world takes a turn for the better when Juliana arrives in town, but she is not the only new arrival. Hot on her heels is the very mysterious Sid, looking like a tramp version of Van Helsing.

It transpires that there is indeed a werewolf on the loose, and ripping young virgins to shreds. This worries Jamie considerably as he has yet to lose his cherry. Despite his falling for Juliana, they never seem to be able to find that special moment for some bedroom shananigans. Could the fact that Sid is always shadowing her be a factor? Is she the werewolf terrorising the town? Is Sid a double bluff, and actually the hairy beast himself?  Do we care?  No we bloody don't.

Sadly this is pathetic entry in the genre of British horror, the most horrific thing about the whole effort is that it was commissioned in the first place. One can only assume that Timothy Spall owes the Director or Producer a favour, or did them a favour,as I can see no reason for an actor of his calibre to appear in such drivel.

However, when you see the score, you may wonder why it is as high as it is. The answer is simple, you get to see Ed Speleers naked, (no frontal) and yes it is worth seeing for that alone, and yes I am that shallow.....sorry folks

All hair and no bite.........4 out of 10

"A Lonely Place To Die"

A nice little mountain climbing trip for some friends, the beauty of Scottish hills, what could possibly go wrong?

It would seem plenty. The group of five friends are enjoying their trip in the hills when a cry attracts their attention. They discover a young girl buried alive in the ground. They free her, but that is when their troubles really begin, as the men who buried her are on the scene, and are keen to recapture her.

I knew very little about this film before having viewed, and this benefitted me greatly. This is one of the best films I have seen all year. From the first frame the film never lets go. The characters backstory and friendship is set up very efficiently, allowing the Director to get on with telling the story. It is very compelling, taut, and has some stunning photography.
The kidnappers start to lower the quota of mountain climbing friends, but this is a film of two halves as we change scenery in the second half to a local Scottish village, where the Kidnappers, Mountain Climbers, and the men with money all converge.

It may sound far fetched, but is far from it. The story is brilliantly written and has an excellent cast bringing it to life. Julian Gilbey is at the top of his game and his Directing skills are showing British Talent at its very best, alongside his equally talented brother William.

For a suspense filled time at the cinema, I can think of nothing better to recommend than this masterpiece......9 out of 10